The post revival

When it comes to eating, laughing and specially talking crazy verbosity and rubbish out of one’s mouth in a creative way, I can say I have a special talent. A talent which was totally gone for the last 3 years according to the last post in this blog; a post that reminded me how liberating and a good stress relief this can be.

During the first two weeks of 2016, I probably have had more emotional breakdowns than I would have thought of before starting the year, but it is this irony streak that made me (apparently) to finally wake up from the bed with total energy, have a perfect night of sleep and of course, revive this blog.

What is actually that thing which actually make us move and feel like having infinite energy supply?

I recall writing once something about “inspiration”(related directly to being in love) and how magical and interesting was to feel like walking on the clouds, holding sweating hands to the significant other and watch how everything was like pure tetris bonus. I still believe this is a factor that can cause that. But only one though.

Money, social life, adrenaline, sex, peace, hate, envy, rebelliousness, ignorance, knowledge, confusion and focusness, and the list goes on and on. So many things that cause indeed a high impact into our daily lives. But why just some persons look happier? Like really WTF. I’ve read and heard that question everywhere; statistics, books, reading the palms of the hands, websites, YouTube videos, Facebook posts like “click here to figure out which city you belong to”, blah blah blah. But that question is certainly a HUGE deal because most of us do care to be happy and find the eternal happiness fountain. Most of us.

At this point of my life I’ll stick to dreams, to fight for them and to seek that perspective in which you just go fucking for it. No less.

But then what?

The previous week I found myself studying for final exams TOTALLY unmotivated, complaining about how cold it was and how alone I felt. And I must say this “was” me fulfilling my dream, at least supposedly. I’ve been lucky enough to appreciate life as something beautiful, priceless and tough as hell. I would like to say that life provides and takes fairly but is not like that. One lives life subjected to many factors, some controlled, some uncontrolled, some imposed, some learned, but in the end, it is always a matter of attitude and action.

And then last night, in a very random way, the strange magic of life struck on me and just said something like “Say what again. I dare you. I double dare you motherfucker”. Pure wisdom that I believe finally made me to cherish what I have accomplished lately and today and gave me the impulse to jump off high. Again.

So? Well let’s fucking enjoy it. Let’s be humble and realistic enough to accept it, embrace it, share it if possible and enjoy it as long as it lasts. Smile at people (not strangers if you are in Scandinavia cuz they would freak out). Hug. Kiss. A lot. Laugh. Feel. Stop going crazy inside that happiness decision loop of “oh, should I do it? or not? I know want to, but…no I don’t know, but should I do it?”. Sometimes consequences might make us feel scared, but I mean, that’s life’s loop itself isn’t it?. I like to be afraid so as to seek courage.

Thus as romantic and stupid as I might appear, I’m more than happy to share (fucking arrogant basterd) with you the highlights of my previous 3 years:

  1. Overcoming previous NY intense relationship experience.
  2. Succesfully college graduated. Yay for mechanical engineering.
  3. Falling in love with an italian.
  4. Dramatic breakup with an italian.
  5. Kissing and a bit more with highschool crush.
  6. 1st job as car tester and pilot.
  7. Getting fired from the 1st job because of “prohibited” picture.
  8. Getting a job 2 days after getting dismissed, in aviation business.
  9. Moving out from parents house due to work location to dabble in independant life.     (I always hated paying the rent and salary taxes)
  10. 2 years of work success, knowledge and Budapest. (Thanks GE)
  11. Foo Fighters concert in Mexico.
  12. Dating and starting to like a “J” girl. Also an “A” girl.
  13. Getting dumped (twice) and re-structured whole emotional life.
  14. Getting in good physical shape and learned how to box.
  15. Surviving a car crash to a bull at high speed.
  16. Finding the meaning of a true friend.
  17. Falling in love with another “J” girl. A full relationship experience which will be expressed other time.
  18. Falling in love with good whisky.
  19. Improving cooking and cocktail skills.
  20. Tomorrowland in Brasil + Rio de Janeiro + samba. (Thanks life)
  21. Getting accepted in Sweden for engineering master studies.
  22. Getting a mexican scholarship for previous point. (Thanks “J”)
  23. Meeting the THRUSTERS. Good friends.
  24. The Stockholm subway everyday. (#physicallyperfectseñoritas)
  25. Met and hung out with “S” girl. Emotional checklist review was required. (Thanks again “J”)
  26. Estonia, London, Ireland, Edinburgh, Germany.
  27. Being far from home, family and friends. Feeling sometimes the engineering skills were not good enough. Lack of sun. Not obtaining desired tests results. Feeling alone. And getting struck by life’s energy to be more motivated than ever.
  28. Living the dream and the present.